September 2009
89 posts
Sorority girls… Nature’s bulk photocopy job.
Sep 29th
RT @webvanessa ShannonElizab: Welcome to Twitterland @jeffschroeder23 !
Sep 29th
Found flaw in spare key under potted plant trick: not placing spare key under a potted plant.
Sep 29th
First Niner game I get to see this year and damn do they suck.
Sep 28th
Being a San Francisco Giants fan helped me brace for this. Folks, there’s a lesson here: Never try.
Sep 28th
Haven’t had a running game all day so… Why not run the ball in crunch time?!
Sep 28th
#FortyNiners Here comes the comeback.
Sep 28th
Finally watching #BreakingBad. Damn impressive.
Sep 28th
Latest Giants’ victory feels like every late-September win since 2005: Empty and meaningless.
Sep 28th
Ice cream!1
Sep 26th
Lenny = white Carl = black
Sep 25th
Would you like to take a survey?
Sep 24th
Opera singers chatting about their craft sounds a lot like actors chatting about auditions they didn’t get.
Sep 24th
Oh bureaucracy, you and your mountain of paperwork and permits… and running around to various departments… with inconvenient hours.
Sep 22nd
Just saw “Jackie Brown” for the first time in forever… wondering why some people think it’s Tarantino’s best.
Sep 20th
The Informant! was pretty good. Recommend.
Sep 20th
I look down to tweet for two seconds and the gf disappears.
Sep 20th
The Informant! and Big Fan on the viewing docket this weekend.
Sep 20th
When gays marry, it ruins it for the rest of us.
Sep 18th
You ain’t TALL, midget! You juss clev-uh!
Sep 18th
If I can’t scuba, then what’s this all been about? What am I working toward?
Sep 18th
… we used to go on these long walks on the treadmill…
Sep 18th
1 hour til the Sunny comes out!
Sep 18th
#TwitMovie “Tweetbusters,” “Good Will Tweeting,” “High Fidelitweet”
Sep 18th
It’s Always Sunny in Philadelphia blasts us all in the ass tonight on FX! The cable channel!
Sep 18th
UCLA Band playing a great cover of “Take On Me.” drum corps totally animated!
Sep 17th
I am still feeling the papercut from this morning. #reasonswhyiamapussy
Sep 17th
RT @KenTremendous FJM on Deadspin today. Read it and opposite-of-weep!
Sep 16th
Hopefully, Orci & Kurtzman don’t use the same allegory for the Trek sequel as they did for the Transformers sequel. http://bit.ly/ggx0P
Sep 16th
Was at Big Brother finale. Watching reality really happen is a lot like sitting on a park bench and people watching. Altho, more applause.
Sep 16th
Even Jay seems bored.
Sep 16th
Diane Keaton flosses at red lights… Just like everybody else!
Sep 16th
Easy to dislike Bush and his administration, but it’s also a relief to read something that humanizes him: http://bit.ly/glIkN <—Great read!
Sep 16th
RIP Patrick Swayze. You were a cool cat.
Sep 15th
Steve Young doing color for a Raiders game… all kinds of wrong.
Sep 15th
I’M REALLY HAPPY FOR YOU. I’M GOING TO LET YOU UPDATE. BUT, BEYONCE HAD ONE OF THE BEST TWEETS OF ALL TIME.
Sep 15th
NINERS!!
Sep 14th
http://bit.ly/b5jRp Movies about the Theory of Evolution are too controversial for American audiences; fighting robots a-ok though.
Sep 14th
Preparing for my first viewing of The Breakfast Club. Will be watching with blow up Ally Sheedy.
Sep 14th
Randy Winn bats third for the Giants in the middle of a pennant race. We’re in this!
Sep 14th
Farewell, #KingoftheHill!
Sep 14th
First and only athletic trainer consultation today. 1. He lusted after my girlfriend @webvanessa and 2. exposed my various insecurities.
Sep 14th
Sun… I demand you not set for another hour or so! Delay the solstice!!
Sep 13th
I think vampires are in a tough spot right now. On one hand, they have a lot of admirers, on the other hand, they have to sire Twilight fans
Sep 13th
Oh Wahoo’s, how can I resist you?
Sep 13th
Giants are so stupendously boring that not even Vin Scully can make this game entertaining. Urge to sleep rising… RIzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz
Sep 12th
#funwithcelebritynicknames Apple “one” Martin. “Are you” Suri Cruise. Jaden “Granny” Smith.
Sep 12th
Mindy “London” Kaling. Alyssa “Double Chocolate” Milano. Jimmy “Lil’” Kimmel. #funwithcelebritynicknames
Sep 12th
Michael “Mia” Cera. Jim “Mariah” Carrey. Ben “Di” Stiller. #funwithcelebritynicknames
Sep 12th
Michael C. “Radio City Music” Hall. #funwithcelebritynicknames
Sep 12th